Friday, July 21, 2006

Truckophobia by Nadine Touma


A new psychological disorder hitting all the Lebanese people living in Lebanon.
Its manifestations started on Tuesday, July 18, 2006 when the Israeli aggressors started bombing every truck in sight thinking that they were carrying ammunitions for the resistance in the south!
It turned out that they actually bombed trucks carrying humanitarian aid relief like ambulances, medications, food, and fruits and vegetables that were all generously donated and sent from neighboring countries.

The signs of the “Truckophobia” psychological disorder appear when the Lebanese citizen finds him or herself near a truck.
The signs are:

-Screaming “Ya mama camion”

-Addressing the truck driver with a go go go go sign with the right hand

-Fast heart palpitations

-Sweat drops starting on the forehead spreading to the palms of the hands

-Running in the opposite direction if walking in the streets

-Driving very fast if in a car

-Commenting on what the truck could be carrying:
-Chou what do you think?
-No it seems like cloth rolls to me!
-Yiy! Maybe the Israelis from their airplanes will think that the rolls are rockets and they will bomb us! Come on let’s go, yallah!
-No walaw they are not that stupid!
-Ya haram not that stupid!!!!! They mistook watermelons for bombs and they won’t mistake cloth rolls for rockets?????

-Once the truck is far enough and the Lebanese citizen is safe from danger, they say
“El hamdellah, Zamatna, we made it”

-Then if on any anti stress or anti depressant or any kind of relaxing medication, they pop a pill in their mouth and swallow it dry.

Psychiatrists and psychotherapists in Lebanon are looking for a cure for the “Truckophobia” disorder and welcome any suggestions from the esteemed international psychiatric boards unless the latter are as quiet and as numb as their political leaders.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

:-D thanks for making me laugh for the first time in a week :-)

12:59 PM  

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